Hang in there...

I think my wife needs some encouragement right now. She is facing some physical and emotional struggles and is having a hard time getting through it, so this post from me is as much for her as it is for anyone interested. For the past year, we have been wanting another baby (believe it or not). We would like to have at least one more and it's been hard to see the year go by, month by month without any results. It feels like Deja vu, as we went through the same waiting and hoping up to about 4 years ago when she got pregnant for the first time after 3.5 years of trying. No doctor has been able to tell us exactly why it takes so long. One possible cause, though it has never been overly severe, is that she has endometriosis. Over the year, she has been getting increasingly worse symptoms including pain and nausea, etc. each month, which makes the hoping and waiting even more difficult. Each month, the symptoms are a little different and are almost always very similar to those experienced by someone who is pregnant. We have gone through quite a few pregnancy tests, hoping for a different cause for the symptoms. This past month has been the worst so far and we had her in the emergency room last night as the abdominal pain got so bad. Mind you, this pain is not due to the typical monthly female problems as most would probably think, it is off the usual cycle. Anyway, it is very frustrating because it is not something that can ever be cured completely. It will only temporarily go away if she is pregnant or on birth control, otherwise it progressively gets worse. Doctors can also help to temporarily improve the symptoms by doing a laparoscopic surgery, removing (burning off) some of the affected tissue in the uterus. So, the doctors this week have offered her the options of laparoscopy or birth control, and as you can imagine, she is opting for what will be here 4th laparoscopy since we've been married. This will likely be done next Friday. She has always recovered very quickly from these procedures since they are not very invasive for a surgery.
I think she is being very strong through all of this. Yesterday (the same day she went to the ER) while I was at work, she had the kids all bathed and the house all cleaned up despite here pain. She doesn't probably give herself credit for these little things, but I notice and appreciate them, as I'm sure the kids do too. She struggles in ways that I can't understand with her disability, raising our 3 kids, and putting up with me along with these extra physical and emotional concerns. I look up to her for this and hope that she realizes how great she does at everything. Janese, I love you and pray for you all the time as you go through these difficulties. I know that the Lord blesses us with what is best and sometimes a trial of our faith is required as it says in the scriptures. I know that you feel at times like the trials never end, but know that you are a blessing to my life and the lives of our children and all will be right in the Lord's time and we will get through this just like we have before. We will eventually look back, just like we did after we got 3 kids within 18 months, and say I understand now why everything worked the way it did, and it was the right way. Now as far as the physical pain right now, you are strong, and you also have some strong drugs from the ER :) haha, that will get you through and I and many others are here for you. I love and appreciate you and look up to you!
Love,
James