Answered Prayers

James and I decided that we've waited long enough, so we made an appointment to go see a fertility specialist. We just felt that this was the direction we needed to go. So, last Friday I made the call and scheduled an appointment. I was mixed with emotions. I was excited, scared, nervous, but felt relieved because I knew we would get some help. They were really nice and told me that I had to get all of my medical history and things like that for our appointment, I thought that's gonna be a lot of work. I've had a ton of things done and at a bunch of different places, so I'd have to call everywhere, but I knew it would be worth it. So, on Saturday evening, I told James let's just take a pregnancy test just to make sure it was negative, because if by chance it was positive I wouldn't need to get all of my medical history for no reason, and if it was negative then I knew I would be starting any day. Well, I took the test and as soon as I peed on it the positive line immediately showed up. It was positive!!! I'm pregnant!!! James and I were SO surprised! We couldn't believe it. Our prayers were answered. We feel so blessed to be given another sweet baby to love and raise. It still feels like a dream to me. Baby number five will be here sometime in October! Yay!!

My struggles with Infertility.

James and I have been trying to have another baby for over a year now. It has been hard. My endometriosis started getting really bad again about nine months ago, so in November I had my fourth surgery to help get rid of as much endo as they could and to help with the pain. Endometriosis is so hard to deal with. I'm in pain all the time and I am usually in bed for three-four days because of my cramps I have when it's that time of the month. It's hard. I feel like such a bad mom because I'm always in pain and the only thing that helps is if I rest a lot.

It's so hard because we feel like there's another sweet spirit that needs to be in our family. It just feels like there's someone missing. I don't feel complete and the hard part for me, is knowing that I can get pregnant, but it just takes so long for it to happen. Before I got pregnant with Gracie I had a miscarriage and then the next month I got pregnant again with Gracie. It took three years and with Anna it took over a year. With surgery both times. And in September 0f 2010, I'm pretty sure I had another miscarriage. It was hard on me, but we just let it go. Nobody even knows, except you do now.

I'm sure some people may think,"they have four kids already," or "just be happy with what you have." And believe me, I am so HAPPY with my four sweet children, but I YEARN for more. I do know that Heavenly Father is in charge and he knows our needs and the desires of our hearts, but it's still hard. For James and I, this has been one of the hardest trials in our marriage that we've had to face together, trying to bring children into our family. When we were first married and that first year went by of trying to get pregnant, I would always think, Isn't this what we're suppose to do, get married and have children? I didn't understand why it wasn't happening. It was very hard. And luckily things did work out. We adopted our boys and eventually I did get pregnant with Gracie and Anna. And I do know that it will happen again. I'm just praying it will happen sooner than later.

This young man turned the big 8 on December 11th. I am truly blessed to have him as my son. He was baptized on January 9, which also happened to be Tyler's birthday. We had to write a little bit about Chase for his baptism and this is what we said.

Chase Earl Pearson was sent to his parents through the gift of adoption. He came as an answer to countless prayers and much fasting over more than 2 years. He was only 4 pounds when he was born and had to stay in the NICU for 3 weeks. His parents were there with him the whole time. He is such a great blessing to his family and has a special loving spirit about him. He has always been very thoughtful and caring to others and very obedient and responsible. This makes him a great example and a great big brother. He loves to play with his younger sisters and brother. He loves outdoors and video games. He also loves school.

We are very proud of Chase and the young man he is becoming.

Over the Christmas break, we took our own family pictures and I love how they turned out. I love my darling little family. I would be so lost without them in my life. My children make me want to be a better person and I work hard every day to be the best that I can. And, I am SO grateful for such a loving husband. He's truly my best friend. We have so much fun together.

Our beautiful Gracie.

My four biggest blessings! And they ARE getting big!

This little angel turned 2 on December 2nd. I can't believe it. She is such a sweetheart and I'm so thankful I have her. I would be so lonely during the day without her. She keeps me busy and entertained all day long and I love it. She is the best little talker too. James and I look at each other sometimes and say where did she learn that. She is pretty smart and is always making us laugh. I just LOVE her cute little personality. Oh, and she has major attitude. She will tell you what's what! I admit it, she has me wrapped around her pretty little finger.

Tyler turned seven January 9th. He is the most lovable little guy and is such a good kid. He loves his big brother and sisters. We are so grateful for him and his sweet spirit.

HappY Halloween!

Halloween was so much fun for me this year. The kids had the day off from school, so we hung out all day together. We went to my pre-op visit since I'll be having minor surgery next week. Then we went to Wal-Mart to do some shopping to get ready for Halloween. We were there forever. It was so crowded with people. A lot were dressed up, which was kind of fun for the kids. Then, we went home and they all helped me carry in the groceries while I put them away. They're such wonderful little helpers. Here are their pumpkins they used this year.

The kids were so excited to go Trick-Or-Treating and it made me excited for them. I seriously love having children. They bring me so much joy and happiness. This year Chase was Batman, Ty was Bumblebee from Transformers, Gracie was a cat, and Anna was a Lady Bug.

Trick-or-Treating

Anna went to a few houses and then she was done. She just wanted to stay in the car and eat the few pieces that she got.

When we were all finished, we went home, the kids went through all their goodies they got while I made broccoli potato soup, which was delicious, and we had donuts and watched part of Monster House. It was a school night, so the kids couldn't stay up too late. We had a wonderful evening together as a family. My FAVORITE thing to do.

My four little Vampires!

I hope you all had a wonderful Halloween this year. I sure did.

Returned with Honor

On October 25th, my little brother returned home from serving his mission for two years! I am so proud of him! I love him so very much and I know that he will be so blessed in his life even more for serving the Lord. He is an amazing son of God. He is always so caring and very considerate of others. And he is the most hilarious person! He can always put a smile on my face.

It was such a wonderful experience to be able to go to the airport with the family to pick him up. I was so emotional and I could not wait to give him a great big hug. Of course, my beautiful mother got to be the first one to hug him. It was SO sweet.

The six of us back together again. I absolutely love my family.

Our large family there to greet my brother.

My gorgeous sister, me, and my beautiful mother. They are incredible woman and I'm so blessed to have them in my life.

I'm grateful for my body.

(Look at all that hair!)

This is me.

When my dear sweet mother was in labor with me, the anesthesiologist put the epidural needle in the wrong place in her spine, and it caused her to have three Grand Mal seizures, one right after the other. And in a result of that, it caused me to have a form of Cerebral Palsy. I almost didn't make it. They named and blessed me right then and there.

Growing up was pretty hard. I knew that I was "different" from the other kids and I had a lot of insecurities. I still do to this day. I was blessed though. I had great friends who loved me and there were only a few times that I remember being teased. And, I have been so blessed with such wonderful parents and siblings. One thing I am grateful for is that my mom always taught me to never say the words "I can't." We could never use those words growing up. I teach that to my children now. :-)

Even though physically I can't do everything, I always do the best that I can. Every day is challenging for me though. And It's so hard to think positive sometimes and I get down a lot. Especially during the winter months because of the cold weather. My body becomes even more stiff and achy. I rely so much on my Heavenly Father to guide me and help me through those challenging times.

The reason why I am writing about this, is because the day has finally come, I knew would eventually, (and it's therapy), that my children are starting to ask me questions, like, "Why can't you run?" or "Why can't you ride a bike?" Things like that. It has just been on my mind a lot lately and I want all of you to know that I am so grateful for this body that I have been given, even though it's hard, and I pray that through this trial, I can help and encourage you all to be happy with who you are. We are all different and unique and it's such a wonderful thing!

I am so blessed in my life. I have a husband who loves me and I am a mother. It's all I ever wanted.

(Smile!)

(Me and my beautiful mom.)

Our trip to Prague, Czech Republic!

James has been very blessed with his job. One of the blessings are for him to go on business trips and for me to go with him on some of them. This time, we got to go to Europe. I have always dreamed of going to Italy, and Prague was pretty much the closest to it. I love Europe for the Old-World style, the old beautiful buildings that have amazing textures and the cobble-stone streets. One day, we are going to re-do our driveway with cobble-stone. I love it. That's the style we are trying to make our home like, Old-World.

We had such an amazing time together and we couldn't pass on the opportunity for me not to go. All we had to pay for was my plane ticket. Everything else was covered by James' work. Food, Hotel, Taxi's. It was wonderful.

Between the two of us with our own separate cameras, we had a ton of pictures. We walked pretty much everywhere we went, so we got to see a lot of cool things that we may have missed if we were driving. We got to take our time and enjoy it all. I went through them all and picked my favorites that I wanted to share. It was hard because I loved all of them. Most of these are the ones I took. The first 19 or so, James took while we were on a tour bus of the town. Which was nice because it was a rainy day.

This is a Statue of St. Wenceslas, a famous Good King of the tenth century.

Dancing House

You'll notice a lot of pictures of old doors. I had an obsession with them. They were just so cool to me.

Prague Castle Gate

One of the Courtyards at the Prague Castle.

Prague Castle

St. Vitus's Cathedral

Another Courtyard

A neat old wall from about 1400.

We ate very well on our trip. The food was amazing. A lot of Italian and Seafood.

This picture was taken while we were at our hotels restaurant that we were eating at.

"The Tube" or subway that we had to take to where James had his conference.

The longest, fastest escalator I have ever been on. It pretty much gave me a panic attack.

Us, at dinner, Again.

This was outside of our hotel room.

Prague Bell Tower

Little Devil Stream

Us, on the famous Charles Bridge.

The King's Court, Our Hotel we stayed at.

Eating outside at our hotel's restaurant.

Night shot of our hotel.

This neat building with the horses on it is called the House At The Minute.

Astronomical Clock at Old Town Square.

Old Town Tower

Prague Castle up on the hill in the distance.

The view from the Prague Bell Tower.

Charles Bridge

Powder Tower

So, let me explain these pictures of me getting my hair done. The outlets in Europe are different then ours in the US, so we had to buy a converter so I could use my blow dryer and straightener. Well, I had a little problem with my straightener. It got too hot and it burned some of my hair and then my straightener started to melt. It freaked me out. I thought I ruined my hair, but luckily it was fine. So, I had to get my done and it was a different experience. It ended up being a guy that did my hair and we didn't understand each other very well either. But , he did a great job and it felt good to have my hair actually done. There were a few days I just had to wash it and use the hotel blow dryer and then put it in a pony tail. So it was nice.

Dinner again.

These were taken the last night we were there.

Old Town Square

This street we walked down had a bunch of rich fancy stores on it. Like Cartier, Prada, Loius Vitton. I just looked in the windows and dreamed I could afford to buy things.

Us, being silly in our hotel room. We thought we should take a few more pictures of us because we really didn't get a whole lot of us, just a lot of the town.

We had such an amazing experience in Prague. It really did make me realize how blessed I am to live where I do though. Especially where the church is very strong. There's only about 150 members in Prague and the only thing that I could not get used to, was everywhere we went, people smoked. I mean everywhere. It was just different for me. But Prague really is such a beautiful place and I feel so blessed to have been able to go there. Especially that I got to experience it with my best friend. There's no one else that I would have wanted to share these memories with.